The Go-Gos

“Vacation is all I’ve ever wanted, vacation . . . . ”  We used to sing this Go-Gos song in college.  What did we know about needing a vacation?  We LIVED vacation (especially if you saw my GPA).

Today, at this time, in this place, at this hour, I start my vacation.  You may think that I am mocking President Obama by paraphrasing his words and using them to describe my vacation.  But I am not.  I am giddy with excitement and anticipation, even though I know that, on Monday, I will get calls from the office and have to negotiate a work-out.  Even though I know we are spending a week at the beach, sullied with a hurricane’s detritus.  Even though I know that we are in the mother of all recessions (sorry, Ben Bernanke, but we are only technically on the cusp of possibly exiting the recession) and what am I doing spending money on a beach house?  It is an achievement to make it through the Great Recession (at least so far) and live to enjoy a vacation.  A greedy little pleasure that seems a necessary escape from the world’s currently bleak landscape.

I don’t care if it rains.  I just don’t.  I will be happy to be huddled on the couch with my partner and our son, watching Charlotte’s Web, which we’ve seen innumerable times and I cry every time.  And it’s about a pig.  And I am Jewish. And there is no such thing as a kosher pig.  Let’s let THAT urban legend die.

My sister (who, you might have read, is my hero) and her husband can’t join us for the weekend because she is busy being a superhero to a former colleague in need. I wish my sister and brother-in-law could come because it would make for a wonderful family tableau of our generation, except for the absence of my brother and his family.  I don’t write often about him because we don’t have a day-to-day relationship, but he is a good man. I think we get along now better than before.

When we were kids, he used to tease me that I covered up my homework to keep him from copying (he is three years older).  The truth was that I was scared he would catch a stupid mistake and tease me until I was in tears.  It is interesting how these miscues carry through the years.  I was appalled by something he said, only to realize that I didn’t understand the reference and that I had jumped to a conclusion based on my life experience.  He has a totally different life experience now and an entirely different frame of reference than do I.  As I get older, I want more than ever to bridge that gap.  His kids are wonderful and, well, I wish his wife would like us New York family branch members more.  I wish I knew what makes her uncomfortable.  Well, we ARE loud, opinionated, bossy, sardonic, neurotic, urban dwellers, so I get her point.  But I just wish that we could get past any bad first steps and forge a meaningful bond.

Anyway, vacation and family.  Two fabulous word and fabulous together.  Am I blessed or what?

The Most Awesome Day

Yesterday was an awesome day.

Not everything went right but that doesn’t change things; the bad things give the day texture and intensifies what was truly transcendent.

Let’s start with the bad: I had a tiff with the owner of the beach house we are renting starting Saturday. I had to deal with some very friendly but inept bank customer service people. I had to deal with various “fire drills” and on-again-off-again deals at the office.

I couldn’t pick up my son from camp because I needed to see a relative in the hospital, so my partner needed to be SuperMom and SuperPartner and rush up town (as she has done all week) to pick up, bathe and get our son re-dressed for dinner at my dad’s house.  My dad was hosting my aunt and her grandchildren from out of town.  At this point, I have used up all my martyr points and I am way in debt.

So far, a stressful day.

I went to the hospital to visit my cousin who came through very successful surgery. I tried hard not to make him laugh because it hurt. I failed but in the end my cousin was glad for the laughs and ignored the pain. Invariably, gross details of family history come out and, of course, they are funnier in the re-telling because they become ever-more exaggerated.

I left the hospital feeling this strong vibe of life and healing even though I am not the patient. Laughing is good for the soul. Then I hopped a cab to my dad’s house where everyone was waiting, some less patiently than others.

SuperPartner was sweating as my father doesn’t believe in over-air conditioning, and over-compensates in the other direction — “in the Depression, we slept on the fire escapes” — ok Dad, please don’t put that idea in my son’s head. Please, really, stop, stop because that is a crazy thought at any age in any time. I hold my hands over my child’s ears and wait out this story as I imagine child services coming because my child listened to his grandfather.

It was great to spend time with two of my aunt’s grand kids, especially when it comes to explaining who is really who in the family — whether by piece of paper, by blood and through love. For example, the grand kids didn’t know that the wife of a divorced couple was my aunt’s and my mom’s college friend and the husband was my aunt’s first cousin. That meant that though divorced, they had to suck it up and be nice at family gatherings. Then the wife remarried, as did the husband and then the new spouses had to get along. Then the wife died (with both husbands at her bedside) and the second husband remarried. The new wife fell right in family beat by asking questions, like, “so a double mastectomy?” within hours of meeting a person.

As we were laughing through these memories, names of so many we have lost tripped off our tongues. One grandchild asked, “so we are not related to [Person A]?”  The answer of course is yes, dear cousin, we are related because love makes a family. And I love you, my little cousin, and our crazy patchwork of people who makes us a family.

And when we got home and carried our half asleep son into bed, I was full of hope from the laughter, the love and the healing of this day.

Jon Cronkite Stewart

Someone wrote somewhere: push the panic button when Obama loses Jon Stewart.  LBJ knew he lost the confidence of this nation to fight the Vietnam War when Walter Cronkite essentially called it an unwinnable quagmire.

Jon Stewart wondered aloud whether Obama is ten steps ahead of us or if health care is kicking his butt.

According to random and anecdotal polls, Jon Stewart is today’s most trusted name in news.  (Psssst, CNN: stop claiming that honor — you are a weak also-ran at best.)

Here is the crazy part:  wait for it, wait for it, here it comes . . .

He does fake news for Comedy Central. 

That should tell us and the politicians that we are living and thinking in an alternate universe.  The jokesters are the prophets and the leaders are their very own caricatures.

Jon Stewart is just a comedian, but the times make a person.  For now, the times demand that he keeps politicians and talking heads honest within a corrupted system (but only if he is funny, because otherwise no one will watch).

He should get the Presidential Medal of Honesty and Comedy (a quasi military honor known in the military argot as PRE-MED-HAC, which Stewart probably was before he failed Organic Chemistry).

But he should get this high honor only on a president’s last day in office, so it doesn’t interfere with his lampooning.

My Sister, My Hero, Part II

For you were strangers in the land of Egypt . . .  Every Passover, Jews are reminded to be kind to the stranger because we were strangers in the land of Egypt and, well, you know what happened and how Charleton Heston had to lead us out with a mighty hand. . .  The quintessential Jewish mother’s Midrash on this principle is “be kind to strangers; just don’t TALK to them”.

My sister is not a religious person.  She is a spiritual person and that is in my view the important quality.  My sister took into her home a very sick former colleague who had no family nearby and is trying to get this person help.  Not because of a religious admonishment or directive but because of a spiritual imperative to lend a hand to those in need.  She is like my mother (of blessed memory) in that way.  She shrugs a silent “whatever” when anyone talks about religion.  She, like my mother, does what others only talk about doing.  And I only know because my sister had to miss a family dinner to help her former colleague.  Otherwise, I might have never known.  Because she does what needs to be done because it should be done and not for bragging rights.

Lest you think she is the Flying Nun or Mother Teresa with the glow of G-d upon her, my sister is definitely a real person with bad hair days (less so now that she colors her gray, oops, that shouldn’t appear in print I guess) and a limited attention span for most people. So, a saint she is not. 

And still, she heals the world by her very presence among us.  My sister, my hero.

When I get it right . . . .

40andyounger(for now) thinks I am too political, too depressing, not uplifting, etc.  So do some other people.

I am a neurotic, Jewish, urban professional in her mid-forties.  How am I supposed to see the bright side of life? 

IT IS NOT IN MY DNA.

That is why I have invited some friends to contribute to my blog, as a way of lightening things up.  In the mean time I will struggle, STRUGGLE, to find something that would even make me sing in the rain (ok, a person could catch pneumonia) or walk on air (ok, a person could fall and break her neck).  Ok ok ok ok ok ok.  This is going to be hard.

Illustrated Woman

Does anyone remember the creepy movie, “The Illustrated Man” with Rod Steiger as this totally tattooed guy with one clean area on his back into which you can look and see how you die??  One of those 60s/70s heavy, deep, allegorical and downright creepy movies.  Well. .  . . .

I saw a woman who was wearing shorts, a tank top and flip flops. She was covered — truly COVERED — with tattoos. From her chin down to just above her hands (I think the hands were pretty clear) down to her feet (although I declined to use my x-ray vision to see behind her tank top and shorts — for surely, I would have gone blind).

Without staring so obviously (me, obvious?), I tried to see a pattern or symmetry, if any. But, really I know nothing about tattooing and this “art form” so I need to read up. Was she displaying hopes and desires and personality traits in symbols on her body? Or was this self-mutilation gone wild, a la Ani DeFranco? Hmmmm.

Ooh la la la, GOP Hammer Goes Dancing

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Some of us may remember former Representative Tom Delay, affectionately known as “The Hammer” for his role as GOP whip in the Congress, as an aggressive, partisan operator.

In a move the proves that politics and game shows are alteregos, The Hammer has announced that he is auditioning for a place on TV’s “Dancing With the Stars”.  I haven’t decided whether I am more embarassed for him or the show.

This raises some very complex issues:thumbnail[2]

  1. Will he be paired with a dancer of little fame or a Democrat with star power?
  2. Will he make suggestive dance moves that would alienate the conservative right and delight the left leaning tangoistas? images[1]
  3. Will we be able to read into his dance what he thinks of health care reform by just how much he struts his 60+ year-old body around?
  4. What if he is voted off? Will the right wing picket the show and accuse it of being un-American, commie and pro-health care reform?
  5. Will sitting members of Congress be in the audience wildly cheering him on?  Will they neck dance?
  6. Will Sarah Palin draw an example from this and audition to be a contestant on the Amazing Race?  I just realized how ironic that would be.
  7. Will the GOP release a statement that The Hammer was in no way following the example of disgraced former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich?
  8. Will The Hammer wear effete dancing shoes and tight sequined clothes, signalling a softening on gay issues?  Will John Ashcroft, our former US Attorney General and lounge lizard,  join him behind the piano with a Liberace candelabra on it?tdy_nod_bush_041110.300w[1]
  9. Will Delay appear with Donny Osmond, a famous Mormon, and will that give Mitt Romney the needed boost to go for the 2012 GOP Presidential nomination?ss-090817-dancing-2009-tease.vsmall[1]

(P.S.: 40andYoungerForNow — is this less depressing?  Tom Delay today was a gift.)

Still bothering me

Cheney says the statute of limitations has run on his secrets.

Does that mean that the statute of limitations has run on the classified “secrets” relating to renditions, the exposure of Valerie Plame, the panel of “oil executive environmentalists” who helped shape our energy policy, the behind the scenes deals giving Halliburton no-bid contracts and the lies and half-truths in the run up to war in Iraq?

If Cheney can tell secrets, then the secrets about him should be open for viewing.

Overdrive

Notwithstanding my report of a perfectly lovely Saturday evening out, I spent most of the weekend in bed and sleeping off a virus/bacteria of some sort.  Not only did I feel physically bad but I felt this angst about wasting time and being unproductive.  Watching TV only reinforced how useless I felt.  There were things to do, time to spend with people, errands to run and I had no energy and a sick stomach. So, I started reading the Senate bill on health care and then the House bill.  I am about 25% of the way through the house bill and since I read that the public option is on the negotiating block, I stopped reading until there is some clarity.

There are many simple reasons for my angst: I missed spending time with my partner and our son who went about the days as usual; I wasn’t outside on a sunny day (even though it was hot); I didn’t take care of many errands.  But there’s more.  As a professional who takes pride in her high level of productivity, I am faced with a recession-imposed low level of productivity at work.  So, if the weekends are similarly unproductive, despair creeps in.

The hard psychological lesson of this economy is learning not to be wound so tightly, not to see oneself only by measures of income and productivity.  Hard lesson.  With any luck, the recession will be over soon and I won’t have to learn this lesson.  Well, until the next recession in 7 years.

Fair and balanced disagreement

The play-by-play of my review of the Senate bill and my back-and-forth with Mr. Rightcommentary on twitter.  He and I are at odds because, I surmise, we fundamentally disagree on the issue of whether health care is a right or a privilege.  That is a FAIR disagreement.  His theory is based on systemic forces and not a smoking gun in the legislation.  That is also fair.  I can respectfully disagree with him.

Tweets:

  1. I’m on p.104/615 of Senate bill & only controversial provision is feds will give grants to states to provide low cost insurance alternative. 
  2. Sarah P: I’m reading the bills & no death panels so far
  3. the bills don’t create nationalized medicine either. i get to keep my insurance & coverage will be better.
  4. tax is only on certain persons who don’t buy or provide insurance for workers. many exceptions though. Better than use my taxpayer $$ from mobile web
  5. credits for employers who pay full premium; fed grant for under-served communities
  6. p.225 of senate bill tries to set standards of acceptable practice – not as death panel but safe harbor against spurious litigation
  7. oh, wait — p.301 talks about education on medical decision-making btwn patient. MD, family — still no death panels.
  8.  @rightcommentary — i am reading the bills — senate first . what page of HR bill does it say public op for all?
  9. @rightcommentary: really, please point to the page in HR bill. I am reading now.
  10. rightcommentary@40andoverblog The requirements of page 15 as i recall where it sets up what is a “qualified plan” combined with the reqs re: old policies
  11. @rightcommentary: I am reading H.R. 3200. Tell me where the offensive provisions are. 
  12. rightcommentary@40andoverblog it’s just too hard to do in 140 chars. from web in reply to 40andoverblog
  13. rightcommentary@40andoverblog email me an email account at[DELETED] and I’ll give you my theory on how it might work…
  14. @rightcommentary just give me the section references in a few tweets. or you can comment on http://40andoverblog.com
  15. @rightcommentary: creating a floor for basic coverage is not = nationalized medicine. from mobile web
  16. @rightcommentary: with coops instead of a govt-run program, are you ok with the legislation?
  17. rightcommentary no. I’m not. Pretty much anything Washington wants to do other than void the 1973 HMO Act – I’m against.@40andoverblog 

 

end of twitter conversation