Author Archives: 40andover

Thought for the not-so-new media

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Too much information is available on Facebook.  And available for everyone to see.

If we could put a man on the Moon, someone techie can figure out how to devise a nuclear-proof fire-walls between parents’ and their children’s Facebook pages.  If you want to know the threat to family values, finding out too much about your parents or your kids can really cause embarrassing (or worse) moments.

For example, how does a father explain to his daughter that his nickname in college was Spanky, or The Fiend?  How does a daughter explain those inappropriate pictures at a party where there are social lubricants in evidence.

I hope that Facebook and its progeny don’t exist when my son is old enough to have a page.  I know I won’t want that information.

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Repeat after me

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I ran into my sister at the gym.  She and I spoke during the day, so she asked, “how was the rest of your afternoon?” I started to tell her about my son’s day at camp (see other blog entry) and she said, “Yeah, I know, I read your blog.”  I am repeating myself before I open my mouth.  Then, I looked around the locker room and she asked, “are you feeling a bloggable moment?” She was reading my mind.  I didn’t have to utter a word.  Hmmm, eerie.

She  finished her work-out and I was just starting, so we kissed good-bye and I left the locker room.  After one second outside, I ran back in and caught her as she was about to go into the shower.  She said, “the guy in the midriff and the nylon short running shorts who smells?  Yeah, I smelled him on my way in.” I opened my mouth. I closed my mouth.  I opened my mouth.  I closed it.  Struck dumb.

I decided not to blog about this.  Nope I am not blogging about my slow metamorphosis into a bloggy-eyed, crazed, typing, mute.

Wait.  What am I doing?  Uh oh.  Uh oh.  Uh oh.

Sigh.

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Growing Pains

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You are only as happy as your child is on any given day.  And your child’s fears and sadnesses are like daggers in your heart.  My mother would say things like this and I totally get it. 

My son is now 7 and he has to manage social interactions and other activities which are not his strengths.  And he has to do so beyond our reach and ability to facilitate the situations.  And he needs to do this without us because he has to learn and grow and all that.  I know, I know, I know, I know.  I also know that I want to protect my little boy from all of life’s hurts from little boo-boos to real bona fide problems.  I totally get why his imaginary worlds are way easier.  If I were the least bit creative, I would really have grooved on imaginary worlds.

Last night he was so sad about having to do a performance at camp today.  It was the entirety of his world and it was heartbreaking.  I could tell him and tell him again that he should trust me that everything was going to be ok, that I know these things, that I am not letting anything bad happen.  I could just hear his dread and feel his sadness and self-doubt.  Finally, after a story, he fell asleep.

My partner and I internalized all his sadness, were grumpy until we went to sleep and both slept fitfully.  At drop-off this morning, she promised him french fries with dinner.  She called the camp today and spoke with the director.  She checked on him and he was doing fine.  We are tired, over-wrought, wrecks. He gets french fries tonight for being a trooper.  I need a quart of Cherry Garcia.  And a quart of New York Super Chunk Fudge.  And maybe a french fry or six. 

The good news is that we all survived the day at camp.  I think my partner and I are more the worse for wear.  My son — he’s fine.

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Thank you, Sen. Kit Bond, R-Mo.

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Sen. Kit Bond, R-Mo., had this to say about Judge Sotomayor:

“There’s been no significant finding against her, there’s been no public uprising against her. . .  I will support her, I’ll be proud for her, the community she represents, and the American dream she shows is possible.”

Thank you, Senator.

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Newsflash: Watching TV is even worse for your kids than you think

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Apparently, not only are their minds going to mush but there is a link between blood pressure in children and their choice of TV as their inactive pastimes.

To some it may be a chicken-and-egg issue, but I am going for broke on this one to say that the brain mush-ification is causing kids to choose TV and leading to all these other bad things.

I watch cartoons with my son on weekend mornings and I was so sad when he moved from Arthur and Animalia to the Cartoon networks and WPIX.  Some serious weird stuff on those channels.  But watching this stuff prepares them for adulthood.  Look at what the average American watches:  American Idol, I am a Celebrity–Get me Out of Here, Survivor, Dance your A@@ Off, Deal or No Deal.  The real worry is that if the mushification of the brain starts too early, then by the time a person is 25, his or her brain will be liquid and pouring out of his or her ears.

Now, THAT is something to worry about.

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Welcome home, Euna Lee and Laura Ling

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I cannot begin to imagine what these last months have been like for these two reporters and their families.  And I hope I never understand.  They are home and I, a complete stranger, was overjoyed for them and proud of our government.

Let the pundits criticize.  Here is how I see it.  We are currently engaged in a zero sum chess game with North Korea about nuclear disarmament.  Two reporters became pawns in that game.  Over the course of these months, other than some pointed words by the Secretary of State, there was no swagger or threats from the White House (as would have been the case in the Bush Administration).  There was behind the scenes diplomacy to get these two women home and, more importantly for our national interests, keep them off the nuclear chessboard.  President Obama used his “arsenal” — an incredibly popular former president, the Swiss and the UN.

President Obama made comments only after the women landed safely on American soil and were re-united with their families.  And, he didn’t self-serving take credit for their safe return.  The President got two Americans home for the price of a photo-op with Bill Clinton and Kim Jong Il’s opportunity to say whatever he wants to his people about his visit with Mr. Clinton — something Kim Jong Il does anyway. 

Quietly and effectively, Obama got the job done and may have opened the door a crack to restart negotiations with North Korea.

Thank you, Mr. President and Team Obama.

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Happy birthday, Mr. President

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May all your wishes come true.   And let me help you itemize them:

  1.  a little GOP cooperation.
  2. a country back on track within two years.
  3. a visit from my family at the White House (we would like NOT to stay in the Lincoln Bedroom because it has gotten too much use over the years, a little like a Motel 6).  Let’s pick some dates and firm up with our wives.
  4. a tattoo that says “Made in the USA” so that the conspiracy theorists might go away.
  5. a situation room that looks like Wolf Blitzer’s
  6. getting a free pass once a month on something you say in front of the press.
  7. a date with your wife that isn’t a political free-for-all on the 24-hour news re-cycle.
  8. one day without a full-blown crisis at the office.

And many, many more returns of the day, Mr. President.

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And the Republicans are swiftboating, just as Nero played his lyre as Rome burned.

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Usually, I roll my eyes at Republican tactics.  I didn’t even focus on the viciousness of the swiftboating of Sen. Kerry. 

Why am I so riled and appalled now?

Because just a few months ago, our economy was about to fall off a precipice.  And whither the economy goes, so goes the social fabric that binds us.  And so go the dreams and aspirations and our children’s childhoods.  Now we are a few steps back from the edge of the precipice, but we are not yet safe in our beds.

I was a hard-working and productive worker.  Now, I sit in my office and wonder when I will lose my job or get a further, steeper pay cut.  I wonder whether my practice will ever come back.  I wonder whether I can give to my child all the opportunities I had.  We are at a crossroads.  We need to make the right choice after vigorous debate on the issues.  Fair and honest debate toward a common goal of restarting our economy, our dreams, and optimism.

And the Republicans are swiftboating, just as Nero played his lyre as Rome burned. 

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Don’t quibble about the cigarettes

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If that is Obama’s vice while he deals with the most insurmountable problems of three generations, well, we are just going to have to get over it.

Clinton and JFK were philanderers.  Reagan had Alzheimers and his admininstration kept us in the dark.  Bush II was a “recovered” alcoholic and chose  to let others make decisions for him. 

News flash:  Obama is mortal with flaws.  Not a great example for the kids, but it is a lot better than what most Americans do: slam down some whiskey shots, take sedatives, take out their problems on other people, etc. 

So, everyone, chill.  We gave GWB a lot of slack.

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Is it ok to lie to your child . . . .

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Is it ok to lie to your child if the lie is, “I will always keep you safe,” knowing that as your child gets older, you won’t be able to, but somehow believing that by sheer force of will you will, even when you are 80 years old?  Does reality, science and logic really have to be considered?

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