I am working on my abdominal muscles. But the leaner I get in front, the flabbier I get in the back. What is with back flab?
I asked POB who is my oracle on things like this. She said that back flab is, in fact, a topic of articles in those self-help/keep-it-real magazines.
Essentially, it is an aging thing.
It’s a little like the hint of Hadassah arms (fleshy upper arms prevalent among members of the Women’s Zionist Organization of America) that appeared one day four years ago. No amount of tri-cep exercises can change it. Hadassah arms are a real advantage when entertaining young children — they make excellent flapping noises when one is trying to mimic a bird in flight (what, you mean, you don’t often, and spontaneously, do avian impressions?)
Despite my best efforts at the gym and POB’s best efforts at feeding us healthy, lean foods, I have a vision of turning into Grandma Dora, with the house-dress, the Hadassah arms, the corset pushing her sagging breasts up to her clavicle, and the bra-strap hanging half-way down her arm. And those old people shoes that were gentle on the bunions. And wait, the stockings knotted at her knees. Just the vision could trigger a fatal seizure.
I know, I know. I started with back flab and ended up with corrective shoes. From the Upper West Side, Manhattan, 2012, to Pelham Parkway, Bronx, circa 1969 in three paragraphs. But maybe I am just overreacting.
But the back flab is seriously unappealing.