I am in a real estate closing, waiting for documents to be finalized and payments mades.

A small, but irritating fact, the lawyer for the purchaser can’t stop telling me how important and busy is his client, the husband (busier than the rest of us, who are present, obviously) so we have to have him sign and get out fast.  He clearly does not realize that there are many busy people in this room, two of whom are there out of love and obligation to sellers (one deceased; the other living in an alternate reality).    Whatever.

This lawyer also thinks he is the first person in the world to have a newborn.  Of course, he is speaking to his client, the wife, a woman who has a small child and is pregnant.  He says things like, my wife pumps breast milk all the time.  In fact, he says his refrigerator used to have ice cream and waffles, now it is filled with pumped milk.  I am sure I needed to know that the bassinet is next to his wife’s side of the bed so she can bring him into bed to nurse.  We are now learning about his mother-in-law who is staying with them. She works for a chiropractor. Fabulous.

Wow, to think I lived without his virtual baby manual during the first 7 years of my son’s life.

I just want to get out of here.